Things I learned in Doolittle, Missouri
- Any time is miller time.
- Chewing tobacco when you're a child will likely stunt your growth.
- When there's nothing left to do, drink.
- "Are ya nekkid?!" is an acceptable way to begin any speech, toast, or conversation.
- Missouri has no open container laws.
- Black people don't exist.
- With a little love, a trailor home can look far more homely and feel far more comforting than any place I've lived in during the last 8 years.
- Rap music is just crap without the C.